01 February 2010

State of the Jon Hamm

After a State of the Union (+ Brendan Fraser's clapping problem) cold open, Jon Hamm began his monologue...and NAILED IT. In celebration of his second hosting appearance, Hamm gave us a taste of other roles he's played (as Don Draper). It was hilarious. A hilarious monologue! Who knew!

Instead of a commercial, they jumped right into a sketch set in the roaring 20s, when Kristen Wiig's character was left with no choice after her friends forced her to sing at a party. She could never figure out when to come in (which picked up on a universal, super-tense, momentary terror that I know I've had whenever I'm about to sing), and explained to reluctant accompanist Hamm that she was "not upset, just angry."

SHORTA DIGITALIA. A careless businessman upsets a gypsy, and in turn, he's cursed by a super sexy saxophonist named Sergio. Huge hey Jenny alert here. The hugest. I couldn't believe how seamlessly easy it was for Hamm to transform into an entirely different continent's dreamboat. And I guess I'm saying here that I think Greece is a continent.

The Dems Get A Crush. Around this point, I got nervous that every sketch would be about how handsome and manly Jon Hamm is. I was wrong to be nervous for two reasons: (1) he wasn't that way in all the sketches, and (2) even if he had been, he performed so hilariously and with such commitment that it wouldn't have been a problem. At any rate, the democrats got an insane crush on Hamm as Scott Brown, and one of the older congressmen fantasized about Brown in a flapper get-up. I laughed and laughed. One item: the scene ended with the democrats dancing around Brown due to his magnetic attractiveness, which is exactly how the Sergio thing ended. Why put them back to back?

Michael Bubble did a thing, but I was very tired and ended up fast forwarding through it. And also I think I might've been a little upset that it wasn't Harry Connick, Jr crooning because I worry about him and how he splits the genre with Bubbly over here.

Weekend Update Update:
  • It's true, Obama is sincerely good at debates. Republicans just don't get it, DO THEY
  • Supreme Court Justice Sotomayor, played by Nasim, reminded me of a Gilda impression a little, and that made me very happy, but it could've been that I have a helpless habit of associating Sotomayor with Roseanne Roseannadanna. Eventually she posited that the Supreme Court "make[s] Pat Sajak look like a Dominican drag queen." How many people have I already repeated that line to? That depends, how many people have I spoken to since this?
  • Hawkmadinejad's friends move to the city!
  • Snooki Polizzi made her second guest appearance, reminding everyone that the Jersey Shore castmates are now "like, Buttafuoco famous."
  • Hey Jenny
  • Myspace is now the internet's abandoned amusement park - I agree with this especially, because even when the amusement park was open, I knew it would be closed soon anyway and really felt like I was slumming while there.
  • There is a dog surfing craze? Holy meowly, this is the Weekend Update motherload.
ONE-HOUR MARK SPORTS SKETCH. This week's "Gametime with Randy and Greg" went exactly where it has always wanted to go: Alien co-anchor Greg spawned a new clone out of a Jon Hamm football coach, and every time the camera came back to his side of the desk, there were exponentially more Greg aliens. It was amazingly suspenseful and necessarily hilarious.

Hamm & Bubbly. Jon Hamm had another Hamm-inspired business venture, and this time, Buble was his business partner. Unfortunately, Buble was there against his will, and he reported that Hamm's original pitch ended when his "eyes went black / and he slapped my face." Slapping Michael Buble is a very funny proposition.

Right around here, the commercial came on: Will Forte was The Closet Organizer™, but he didn't really organize anything, and the spot was intercut with Hamm telling the story of how he scored with a black lady. I had a feeling there would be more to come.

Court Stenographer. Fred Armisen played the worst stenographer in the world, I laughed, and then when he said that his mother's nurse was getting married, I realized how similar this lady is to Kay from the Tracey Ullman Show, which made me cry and watch Muriel's Wedding.

Bar/Closet Organizer Part 2. Jon Hamm recognized Will Forte from somewhere, which happens to The Closet Organizer™ all the time. Eventually they went home to watch The Office together, and that could have seemed like a shamless nbc plug, if only "Let's go home and watch The Office" weren't The Commonest Phrase Spoken for the last year or so. The whole night tied off with the history of Barnes & Noble, two gentlemen whose career goal was to provide public restrooms to homeless people. The books were just a cover (cover, book, whoops).

Before I watched the episode, my roommates told me how sincerely good it would be. I had no idea.

Favorite line:
The Supreme Court is so white, "these guys make Pat Sajak look like a Dominican drag queen."

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